Please do not misunderstand, I am not unhappy in the least! All I can say is there are just not enough hours in a day! And I mean that sincerely! There are so many things I want to accomplish while I'm staying with Jr. and Bobbi. I didn't think they were such lofty goals, but as my time here comes to a close, I find myself frantically trying to tie up loose ends.
I have not been home for two weeks and I miss my sweetie in the worst way. I have a sad feeling he does just fine without me there with him. That's a two edged sword, because I love that about him, too. He's comfortable in his own skin and he doesn't need me to be "okay."
He doesn't need me, you see. He just wants me. What a comforting thought. He just likes me around; he enjoys my company. And yes, I know he misses me. I miss him, too.
The past two weeks have flown by as the days have all been eventful ones. I have written about most of them, but as I mentioned moments ago, there are no segments of time to which I could have devoted more time for penning my thoughts.
I have been reminded of what it is like to have a household bustling about. I had forgotten since Tom and I have a rather leisurely life void of hectic deadlines, meetings, school, children, and various sundry obligations. One (I) tend to get lazy when I am left to my own devices.
Each day has brought to me a new challenge and I have such admiration for my brother and my sister for taking it all in stride. They can't possibly know how influential they have been in my life. Positive thinking is a way of life for them and living with them for the past week has been nothing short of paradise.
Not unlike the general population, both my brother and his wife have been through some very trying times, personally, professionally, financially, medically, parentally, singularly and togetherally. Well, you know what I mean.....
This couple of whom I speak have been married just short of thirty years and very much emulate another couple I admire deeply--my parents.
The vein of respect for one another runs deeply, and the artery of support along side of it. Neither is a "yes" person, and both are not only encouraged, but expected to speak his or her mind. I would say that they have mastered the art of conflict resolution, however, I've seen no conflict to resolve.
This is not to say that I have not observed differences in opinion or preference, just that those differences were just that, and no more. That they have the freedom to express those differences without the fear of persecution of some sort is, in my marital experience, uncommon.
Uncommon, that is, until November 3, 2007. That day I entered into a marriage based on trust, mutual respect, and the freedom to be who we are. In fact, as I now remember one small portion of our wedding vows, I promised Tom that I fell in love with the man he was, and that I would not attempt to change him, rather to encourage him and assist him in attaining his dreams and goals.
So often, in various ways, I have fallen short of that solemn promise voiced just one short year ago. Even at age 51 I am unreasonable, impatient, quick to criticize, slow to apologize, and selfish. But every single day and night (and numerous times in between) I thank God for my husband. I know he loves me, but even more than that, he, in spite of all my flaws, even likes me. I can't ask for more than that. I love you, Tom.
A Little Off....
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